Ramble On

Doctrine and Covenants 112:10 - "Be thou humble, and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to thy prayers."

In a twist ending, I had yesterday all to myself!
It was bizarre. I can't remember the last time I had the option to literally do whatever I wanted, free from any outside influences or pressures. From morning to night, I was completely in control of my activities.
First of all, I slept in as long as I could. Noon was a nice time to wake.
Then, I blogged a bit, typed up a portion of my journal, and wrote my book.

I filled in the time with bank inquiries, conversations with family and residents, ukulele jamming, and visits to Jamaba Juice.
By the time 6 o'clock rolled around, I was, for the first time in a long time, completely and totally bored.
Bored? I thought. You're never bored. You are the master at self-entertainment. What do you usually do to stave off boredom?
Well, I replied. I usually blog or type or write or play the uke or run errands or ...
I decided to go for a walk.

It was beautiful, actually. Moisture was in the air, that sharp, pleasing sensation filling my nose, the sky initially gray and gloomy, eventually turning dark and ominous. I threw on a thin hoodie and stepped out.
I needed that walk. I ended up kind of half-praying, half-reasoning with myself about some of the internal struggles I recognized I was avoiding. My enthusiasm for my scripture studies had dropped, turning more into a mere reading or a skimming. My prayers had become more rote. Since my return home from the mission, I've been struggling with the concept of doing things for myself. My purpose then was to help others; now, it seems to be more largely focused on myself.
I thanked Father at the end. I had a heightened resolve and a determination to push through these things, to improve in that which I've let slip.
Here we go.