How I Use My Time (And How I Want to Improve) - Response Saturday #20

This post is in response to this past Tuesday's thinkjoust.

I would argue that I am not a lazy person. Let me break down my average schedule for this past semester.

When I wake up in the morning, I go to my part-time job at Future House Publishing. In the evening, I go to work one of my other two part-time jobs. I 'donate' plasma twice a week. In addition, I work on online coursework, work on creative projects like my novels and this blog, and even throw in some exercise here and there. When I'm finished with all that, I'm afforded a few hours of free time a day.

The question is, what do I do with that free time? Lately, I've been playing video games.

The thing is, I swore off video games for a while there. I started back up this summer because one, all I was doing was working (which meant I was getting burnt out), and two, I wanted to be more informed about narratives in video games, seeing as how becoming a writer in that industry is a possible future career path for me.

The thing is, when I say I use my free time to play video games, I mean all of it. When I'm home, away from work and projects and school, I'm either eating, sleeping, or gaming. That's it.

In the meantime, my impressive stack of books I have yet to read grows instead of shrinking. I've still mastered only one or two chords on my guitar. I haven't figured out how to properly fly a drone yet. I haven't made a YouTube video in months. Except for when I do some one-on-none basketball, I don't go out to appreciate the beautiful summer weather, or take a drive, or do anything physically engaging.

Again, I don't think I'm lazy. But I'm not doing enough with the time I'm given. I can only 'research' video game stories for so long before I'm just wasting time.

So what about all those questions I asked on Tuesday?

Basically, I balance my time between 'working' (which includes my employment(s), my online 'business,' and other responsibilities like school) and video games. As it is, I feel like I have become a slave to routine. I don't do anything because I want to, or because I am reaping true satisfaction from it. Instead, I'm just mindlessly doing the next thing on my check list.

An easy solution would be to take a leaf from Casey's book, but I need modern conveniences for a large variety of reasons, including my work and other things. Sure, what helps me produce blog posts (the internet) may also distract me from improving myself, but the solution may be better time management on my part as opposed to blaming the machine. If I'm being distracted, that's pure user error right there. After all, I know activities that better myself offer the most value in my life.

Either way, the most important thing for me to remember is that life is about living, about loving what you're doing every day. If all I'm doing is working toward goals, always seeking the next 'ending,' then I fail to live in the moment and enjoy what I'm doing. I need to be happy no matter what I haven't accomplished, be it a novel, my education, or even finding a future spouse. I can be happy, right now.

And that's all that matters.

How I Cope With Trials - Response Saturday #17

I apparently picked a tough topic for the thinkjoust again this week. My bad, guys! Either way, thanks to the people who responded to the prompt. Let's jump into my thoughts, shall we?

I recently attended a short seminar by Jeff DeSarbo, a psychiatrist dedicated to the mental well-being of humanity.

And here he is!

DeSarbo spoke a lot about how to find peace by watching and, if necessary, changing the way you think. Let me share some of my thoughts about what he said.

Now, before we begin, I would be the last person to say that this advice is good bedside manner. If you're struggling to cope with a trial, this may not help. However, if you'd like to preemptively prepare for trials with possible coping mechanisms, well, this is your post.

Let's imagine two near-identical situations with one small variable changed. You're walking downtown on a beautiful sunny day, smiling and enjoying the breeze. Now throw yourself in the same situation, but then a construction worker accidentally dumps a bucket of dirty water all over you. For a lot of people, that would be a miserable experience (myself included).

In that moment of being drenched, you have two options. One, you can continue on your way with the same smile and enjoyment. You didn't have any control over the construction worker, so why worry or get upset? Why let the water ruin your day? Two, the other option is to do the exact opposite.

Letting things roll off your back is difficult, especially when you can't control what's happening. I, myself, seek to find someone to blame and even hate when placed into such situations. "Curse you, random rooftop-dwelling construction worker!" I might scream. "I only leave my lair of writing once a year, and this is how I'm rewarded for trying to get some sun on my skin?"

At the same time, serenity is not worrying about things you have no control over. If you can conquer your urges to allow your emotions to be controlled by outside stimulus, then your peace and happiness in life can be that much stronger. If you are the calmest in a sea of chaos, then you are in control.

So what do you think? Was that helpful, or not at all? Let me know in the comments below!

How Do You Cope With Trials? - Thinkjoust Tuesday #48

Original picture taken from On an Adventure: a girl and her boys

One of my friends threw me a link a few weeks ago asking me to run a thinkjoust about the couple featured in the blog On an Adventure: a girl and her boys.

To make a long story short, a couple (Spencer and Whitney) struggling with infertility decided to take 6 sets of photos in honor of Infertility Awareness Week. The first half of the series were representations of modern pregnancy announcements. The second half of the series were parodies of those same announcements.

The photos were a mixed bag of emotions for me. While the comparisons were funny, and Spencer and Whitney's over-the-top emotions perfected the parody, it was obvious the couple found the experience of infertility utterly painful.

However, Spencer and Whitney coped through good humor and optimism. They've adopted two boys, and they seem happy as all out.

At the same time, I could imagine some couples failing to see the humor in the announcements. Some individuals may find the parody photos insensitive, especially if viewed out of context. That isn't to say Spencer and Whitney were wrong to make those photos, but to point out that there are many ways to overcome difficult times.

Not everyone feels confident finding ways to cope with difficult, sad, or depressing times. That's why I wanted to ask you guys how you cope. Do you use humor? Do you take time to be alone and meditate? Do you visit with family or friends?

Let me know in the comments ways you think your methods might help others, and this Saturday, I'll share my own methods of coping.

Don't forget to send any suggestions for future posts via the suggestion link up top! I love you guys, and I'll see you Thursday!

Christmas Report - Throwback Commentary #62

Hey there! This is a commentary about the post I wrote on December 26, 2014! Click here to read it!

December 2014.

My parents ask me, "What do you want for Christmas?"

I say, "World Peace. The cure to hunger. A pet zombie."

Christmas Day 2014.

Of course they came through, surprising me nonetheless. And every single one of those gifts they got me are still on my desk, along with the rest of my desk ornaments.

It's amazing to me how much a gift can mean and how long the appreciation for said gift can last. I still have some gifts from years back that mean a lot to me, even if sometimes I feel like a bit of a pack rat.

But to be honest? 'Gift giving' is not my top love language. I would say it's one of the bottom two, if not the very bottom. At the same time, I truly do appreciate the sentiments behind heartfelt gifts.

And I'll never forget them.

What are your most cherished gifts? Be sure to comment below!

Hey there! This is a commentary about the post I wrote on December 26, 2014! Click here to read it!

Why Mormons Love Temples: from an LDS Blogger

No, I'm not an amazing photographer, this picture is public domain. The rest are as well.

If you're friends with a Mormon, you've likely heard them talk about temples.

"What'd you do this past weekend?" you might have said.

"Oh, I went to the temple!" your Mormon friend said.

"What's a temple?" you asked.

And then your friend told you. They talked about covenants and God and maybe you even glazed over. I probably would have.

But no more! Now I've written a blog post to tell you all about it, and even if you glaze over, you can always come back and remind yourself of the details!

Mormons go to church in chapels every Sunday. A Mormon Chapel might look like this.

Church goes for three hours, split up into blocks of time. While we're there, we deliver speeches, take Sunday School, learn more about Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and the gospel, and make covenants by taking the sacrament.

"Hold on there," you say. "You said something about covenants again. What are those, exactly?"

Covenants are promises we make to God, including promises to keep His commandments and follow His chosen prophets. To demonstrate our devotion to these covenants, we participate in activities like baptism and the sacrament (or communion).

While we go to chapels once a week as part of a congregation, we go to the temple on an individual basis, whenever we'd like. Only those who are actively keeping the covenants they made previously can attend the temple. Once we have declared ourselves covenant-keepers, we are given recommends by our leaders, and then we can enter the temple and participate in even more covenants.

"Even more covenants?" you say. "How many covenants are there?"

An active member of the LDS faith will likely be baptized, receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, receive their endowment, and be sealed to their spouse for all time and eternity. Most of these covenants are extensions of the baptismal covenant, though we take on progressively greater responsibilities with each new covenant. For example, when we receive our endowment, we promise to not only keep God's commandments, but also proactively seek to give all we have to His kingdom.

"Fascinating. I guess I understand why temples are so important."

But wait! There's more!

"There is?"

Yes! While we also make covenants for ourselves, we also redeem the dead through those same ordinances.

"For the dead? So you dig up graves or something?"

No, no, of course not. We believe that the human spirit continues to live long after the human body decays. This is further evidenced in 1 Peter 3:18-22.

"For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:

"By which also he went and preached unto the spirits in prison;

"Which sometime were disobedient, when once the longsuffering of God waited in the days of Noah, while the ask was a preparing, wherein few, that is, eight souls were saved by water.

"The like figure whereunto even baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God,) by the resurrection of Jesus Christ:

"Who is gone into heaven, and is on the right hand of God; angels and authorities and powers being made subject unto him."

Some people, especially those outside Christian nations, never had the chance to hear the Gospel of Jesus Christ and decide for themselves if it was true (like how the verses mention those who perished in the flood of Noah). Mormons don't believe a loving God would condemn those who never had a chance to hear His servants, and so participate in baptisms for the dead, or baptisms by proxy.

Of course, this doesn't take away a dead spirit's ability to choose for themselves. If I were to get baptized in the name of a John Smith who lived back in 1913, John's spirit would have the choice to accept or reject the opportunity. When we perform a baptism for the dead, we're really just giving them the option.

I could go on, but that's why Mormons love temples. In a nutshell, they grant us opportunities to help both ourselves and our ancestors come closer to God.

Who wouldn't love that?

Christmas Report (with Added Commentary)

Matthew 2:11 - "... they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense, and myrrh ..."

My parents are very thoughtful people. A few days before Christmas, we had this short conversation.

The two most important lines are the first ones, but the rest was pretty funny, too.

I just about forgot about the conversation until Christmas morning, when I found this waiting for me under the tree.

It's a pun! Get it? Get it?

The outside of the box.

The inside of the box.

Yes, even my third request.

My parents are silly critters, aren't they?

Hey there! I wrote a commentary about this piece on March 17, 2016! Click here to read it!

What thoughtful gifts did you receive/give this Christmas? Be sure to comment below!

Shattered

Matthew 5:22 - "...whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire."

I made a big mistake yesterday.

My actions are not justified. But I could feel a lot worse about it. That's what worries me the most.

I think now would be appropriate to remind my readership, however small it may be, that this blog is, essentially, my journal. I may share some very personal things sometimes, some things that will hurt to share. I choose to share these things. My reasons are numerous, but the top are, one, I want to be honest with myself and face my weaknesses, and two, I want to deter others from making the same mistakes I have, especially once I know the cost.

I'm pretty bruised right now. Not physically. Emotionally, spiritually, mentally ... you've been there.

Now, there were obviously many positive notes about yesterday. To say otherwise would be entirely foolish. I had the opportunity to help bless the sacrament. I had the opportunity to receive forgiveness for my sins and weaknesses by renewing my baptismal covenant. I had the opportunity to sit in on a youth class and bear my testimony. I had the opportunity to take bro and our mutual friend out on an errand for the Lord, bonding throughout. I had the opportunity to really get some serious work done on my apparently massive journal project. Even in the storms that arise in my life, there is always something for which to be grateful. I'm even grateful for that simple fact. I'm also taking solace in the old phrase, "If your life is going really well, then either something really bad is about to happen, or you're doing something wrong." There's truth there.

ROFL (with Added Commentary)

1 Corinthians 6:19 - "Know ye not ... ye are not your own?"

I had a real struggle with being humble yesterday, a fight I'm happy to report I won. I only do my internship twice a week, all-day Monday, all-day Thursday, and so today was the first time I was actually able to write an article.
Well! I wrote one article, and I was bombarded with praise from all sides. My superiors were so impressed, they gave me another article to write, and once I finished, I endured another series of compliments. Of course, my superiors had suggestions for things I needed to change or fix--I certainly didn't write a flawless article in one draft--but, regardless, I found it would have been very easy to get a puffed head over everything. Thankfully, I was able to keep in mind the simple fact that God gave me every bit of writing talent I have. If I take any credit for any amount of talent I have, all I can say is that I exercised my agency to practice something God already gave me.

My family invited a whole heap of Mormons over for a party right after I got back from my internship, and I wasn't really looking forward to the experience all that much. As you recall from my post from yesterday, large groups of people still wonk me out, so I was worried I would be sitting there, awkwardly unable to participate or contribute to the surrounding conversation. 

Well, to my relief, some of the people who were invited to the party were actually kindred spirits, and our discussion on all things geek brought me much relief. They actually invited me to participate in a good old fashioned Fourth of July game today: Call of Cthulhu. I'm gearing up to check that out in just a few hours. It's funny how God tosses us those little tender mercies.

Hey there! I wrote a commentary about this post on January 15, 2015. Click here to read!

Unplugged

Luke 21:36 - "Watch ye therefore, and pray always..."

I had a couple of neat experiences today. I guess I don't really have too much of a 'change' to report, but at least I have several moments to cherish.
I had an opportunity to sit down and really talk with Doctor Marc Davis, my chiropractor here in Vancouver, about what's going on with my aching back. He showed me some videos regarding what causes back pain, and I was blown away. I finally began to understand how the spine actually works, how our nerves are protected, how subluxations occur, how they're repaired, how the body compensates for spinal damage, how everything in the body connects together ...
Sitting there, watching all of this, I couldn't help but notice that everything in my body had to have been designed. The theory that our bodies were formed by chance is just so ridiculous to me. By that logic, I could be walking through a forest and find a wild computer sitting on a tree branch furiously spitting out equations. How could such a thing come about by chance? All you have to do is look at the central nervous system and recognize just how much like a computer we are. An errant firework can not produce a smart phone.

I attended a religious institute class yesterday, and I really enjoyed it! However, after the teacher closed us off with a prayer and the students began to socialize, I immediately felt out of place. I've lost my ability to make small talk without bringing up missionary work or the Gospel in some way, and so after a few failed attempts to strike up a real solid conversation, I just decided to duck out.

On my way home, I kind of got in the zone way out on the highway, and I didn't even notice until my GPS started screaming at me to turn around. Unfazed, I headed back toward my neighborhood through a back entrance. Even though I've only been here a couple of weeks, I was feeling confident enough to distrust my GPS' directions  through the back entrance, and cockily took a different route than what was asked of me.

My five minute trip abruptly lengthened to twenty.

I was still unfazed. I was jamming out to my tunes, I was enjoying the lush countryside, and I was perfectly all right with everything. I'd been sufficiently humbled. Life was good.

But then, I started thinking. What if God allowed me to be stupid so I could be on this road for some other reason?

I turned my music off and listened.

Well, I didn't meet anyone whose car broke down, and I didn't see anyone who was in particular need of aid, and I didn't see any grand natural sight I hadn't already seen, but the silent fifteen minutes was amazing for me. Even though I was driving, I took the Savior's challenge to pray always, and I just started telling God all about my day, from beginning to end. I'm sure some of the prayer-sticklers out there would tell me I should have been kneeling with my eyes closed, but that was one of the most relaxing and invigorating prayers I've ever uttered, even I as was driving down the road with my eyes wide open and my feet firmly on the pedals. It made the relationship I have with God more personal. It reminded me what a blessing it is to be able to talk with God whenever we want. Some of my fears and worries were swept away. And, as I pulled into my driveway, I felt peace.

Maybe that's why I went down so many wrong roads. 

Out of Retirement

D+C 42:6: "And ye shall go forth in the power of my Spirit, preaching my gospel, two by two, in my name..."

I've made it a personal goal to keep the Spirit of my two-year mission with me by going visiting with the local missionaries once or twice a week. In the two weeks I've been back from Jamaica, I haven't yet gone, so yesterday was a way for me to make up for that.
We brought bro along, and man, was that such a stellar experience! We four began our day by heading out to Five Guys, and then zig-zagged up and down and all over Washougal, searching for those who were willing to let four Mormons in out of the heat. Well, three Mormons in out of the heat; I wasn't bothered by the weather in the slightest.
I as reminded again just how blessed I really am. Some of the people we stopped by to visit are really struggling, both spiritually and temporally. I was particularly grateful that bro was with me; while I have frequented the poverty-stricken streets of a third-world country every day for the past two years, bro has rarely had the opportunity to see or visit anyone below his own social class and standing. I could tell by watching him that he was gaining a greater appreciation for what he does have, and I hope his overarching forgetfulness regarding his personal gratitude was healed, even slightly. I know my own forgetfulness was healed.
All in all, having the opportunity to walk with God's full-time messengers again was a really cool experience, for which I was incredibly grateful.

Not My Words

Doctrine and Covenants 100:5-6 "... It shall be given you in the very hour..."

I was assigned to give a talk/speech/sermon/whatever you call it in my congregation for today's sacrament meeting. Being the cocky little scamp I am, I decided to begin preparations for my delivery a mere hour before the meeting was supposed to begin. I did this all the time back in Jamaica, I reasoned.
Well, there were a couple of factors I didn't consider. For starters, with my release, the Spirit isn't as strong with me. I was far more intimately familiar with the needs of Port Antonio than I now am with the Mount Norway ward. Sitting up there on the stand, with my notes in hand, I recognized that I'd made a grave tactical error. My thoughts and ideas were a jumble. I was wholly unprepared.
Of course, that's the amazing thing about how the Lord works through His servants. Right before I took the stand, I prayed that what needed to be said would be given me. As I spoke, words and phrases I hadn't considered came to me, and I saw many faces staring up at me intently. After the fact, during the rest of the three-hour block, many members of the congregation approached me to thank me for the way my words had touched them. I accepted their compliments graciously, but I knew I had had very little credit owed me. It was all Him.

Our day closed with a peaceful evening at home, surrounded by family and friends of all sorts. I seriously don't understand how I could have taken such experiences for granted before. I don't think I will anymore.

The Point of the Matter

Ecclesiastes 3:1-13: "To every thing there is a season..."

I think focus is my big problem right now. True, yesterday's post focused on focus as well (HA! See what I did there?), but I think, touching on that concept, everything falls down to priority.

One of the big reasons why anyone ever fails at anything, I believe, is a lack of proper priority. Perhaps many of the world's greatest minds have been locked under the sway of outside forces, who place their extraneous interests and desires above that which they've been inspired to do. I certainly could not have even attempted to keep a blog like this two years ago, so focused was I on my 'top two priorities,' namely, 1.) video games, and 2.) endlessly obsessing over ways to gain vengeance for every insignificant instance my pride was nicked. As it was, my chief goals in life - to become a published author, to get married, to enter Christ's presence - were all placed on the back burner. I still have yet to accomplish any of those things, obviously, and the latter objective will take the rest of my life to complete, but now that my priorities are focused on those things, I have a better chance at succeeding. And taking myself out as an example, do you think Thomas Edison would have ever been able to produce commercially practical light bulbs if he'd spent all his free time doing a number of unconnected, unfulfilling tasks? That man had priorities.



My family and I had the opportunity to take a trip to Seattle yesterday, a city I've had an interest in long before I ever had the chance to go. Now that they've moved a little closer, I was able to experience some sights and wonders for the very first time. Throughout the entire day, I was just strongly reminded of the blessings I've been given.

I had people who loved me on every side, and yet, I saw many who were alone.

I had a smart phone from which I was able to get directions, and yet, many begged me for money for food.

I was able to have an extended, relationship-building conversation with my brother, something I can't recall us ever doing.

I was able to ascend to the heavens and see man's machinations mingled with the beauty of God's creations.

I was able to recognize some more improvements I need to make in my discipline and diligence.

All in all, it was a magnificent day. Sometimes, I think I look for the 'big needle' in my life, the big blessing I want ... right now! However, yesterday, I would have been completely content to stay on the ground, as everything I really needed was right there with me. And that is enough.