Children from a Same-Sex Marriage: A Mormon's Thoughts

I had another post written for today, but seeing how everybody's talking about this, I wanted to throw in my two cents.

According to this article (click here), the newly revised church handbook states that any member involved in a same-sex marriage is no longer considered in good standing with the church. Though some wording has been changed, in essence, this has been policy for some time now. As such, I'm not surprised by this announcement.

The news surprising people is that children belonging to a same-sex household are no longer considered candidates for christening and baptism. I'll admit, this surprised me somewhat myself.

As I considered this, I was reminded of an experience from my mission to Jamaica.

I made a wonderful friend by the name of Randy. Randy was smart, intelligent, fun to be around, and we had a lot of similar interests. Randy was not a member of our church, but he wanted to be baptized. Unfortunately, Randy was not of age. He was still considered a minor by law, and Randy's mother wouldn't allow him to be baptized.

The thing is, Randy wanted to get baptized anyway. If we'd let him, he would have been willing to get baptized without his mother's permission, a clandestine dunking, if you will. However, church policy states that without explicit permission from a minor's parents, they cannot be baptized.

Of course, Randy came to church as often as he could. I went home before he turned 18, but shortly thereafter, he was baptized.

I have heard many similar stories regarding minors waiting to get baptized. The key here is that parents have to be willing to support the child in their decision. And support is a big word. Support doesn't just mean allowing a kid to get dunked by some guy in white. Support means helping the child keep the covenants they made by getting baptized. 

This is also important because children and teenagers are notorious for making commitments they don't keep, even despite notable exceptions. The church doesn't want to baptize youths for numbers. A supportive family is a good way to make sure minors don't break covenants they might not have fully understood. If the minor is willing to stick it out until they're 18, then that also represents an act of faith.

In the end, I think this 'new' policy is just the old policy more accurately defined. I believe same-sex parents are more than capable of providing support for their children who want to get baptized. I really do. However, I do believe the situation would be difficult for the even the most earnest parents and most earnest minor. In the end, I don't think waiting is any more of a trial than it has been for millions of other converts.

So, in summary, I understand why this upsets a lot of people. I may be a Mormon, but I have many wonderful friends and family members who are involved in the LGBT community some way or another. This may be troubling news for them. However, no policy on earth will ever diminish my love, appreciation, and admiration for these cherished individuals in my life. I wouldn't want to change them for the world. And regardless of our individual sexual orientations, I don't believe God loves any of us any less.

Thanks for reading.

For my thoughts on the recent Supreme Court Ruling regarding same-sex marriage, click here.